K for khairunnisa
20 april 1992
i have the most wonderful people around me. please dont take them away from me.
11:12 PM | Saturday, June 23, 2018
Well things hasn’t been going well. I’ve quit my current job. It wasn’t an easy decision. And I know I have to face the consequences for that. I guess I am facing it now. It’s ending of June now, and I’m not doing so well to keep myself sane.
I feel like I’m a whole new person now. My confidence has gone down to i don’t even know where or don’t even know if it still exists.. I guess I’m a my lowest in my life. Where i feel like I just don’t know what I’m gona do. I feel like a total failure. I don’t know what future I have. I don’t know if I can make it to the future ??
I feel like I’m slowly losing myself. Is that even possible ? I don’t know who else to talk to. I don’t know who else could understand how I feeling. I sick of hearing that things will be alright. I’m sick of hearing that I’ve got this. If I’ve got this, then why is my life still a mess ? I mean I know I’ve got sooo many things to be grateful of. But you know my life isn’t the same as it used to be. I guess I’ve felt the highest and now it’s just so different feeling being at the bottom. I guess maybe that’s why I feel like a failure? I’ve somewhat tasted success previously, and now everything is just shit. I guess it’s natural to feel like you’re failing in everything when things don’t used to be the way it was.
I’m just hoping that things will slowly fall into place. I don’t know what to do anymore and the most suckiest thing is that I can’t control how I’m feeling now. I do not know how to explain to people and I’m afraid they might not understand me.
I just hope that the old me comes back soon.
2:00 AM | Saturday, December 23, 2017
well it seems like I’m only updating this dusty blog yearly now. It’s already coming to the end of 2017. I’m 25 now. Currently quit 2 jobs this year. Was single for a year till the second half of this year. 2017 has been a rollercoaster ride of emotions and changes for me. Was at my highest high at one point and then changed quickly to the lowest too. I know that this sentence is very much cliche to use every year to sum up the year. But really, just when I thought last year was bad enough, 2017 proved me wrong.
I know I should t be all too negative about it. It’s not like there’s no good thing that came up from 2017. Well there are a few things that I should be grateful for this year. For example, I got to meet my dearest man this year. I thought my heart was closed after last year lol. Amazingly this fella managed to steal my heart uh guys. Gotta give credits to him bcuz i did gave him a tough time at the beginning lel. What’s new? I’m action like that -.- and hey, I guess karma slapped me right in the face hard cuz he’s my dad’s friend son. So yeh, you can imagine how happy they were when they got to know I have a bf now.
Other than my love life, things isn’t that great lol. My life is still a mess. My career has been a challenging one. But I am gona be starting a new job next year. And hopefully I’ll stay there for awhile. In Shaa Allah. Nervous and excited for the new company. I really hope it’ll be better and that I have more confidence in myself next year.
I’m currently still awake and it’s 1:56am as I’m typing this. My tummy isn’t feeling too well. I’m not sure why but it HURTS lika mf. Feels like the other day when I had my UTI. Oh pls don’t come back. Hmm any who’s I think I should try to go sleep now. Till then, I’m guessing the next update will be the end of next year lel. In Shaa Allah 2018 shall be a better year for me and to all of y’all. If there’s still anyone reading this lol. Good freaking night \m/
6:12 PM | Sunday, June 26, 2016
So its one of those random moments where i feel like blogging. Like those once in a blue moon kind i decided to re-live this dusty ol blog. Ok ok enough rambling...
What's up with me lately? Its 2016 already! I'm 24 years old. Currently got retrenched from my first job ever. It's all good. No worries. They gave us our retrenchment money. Alhamdulillah for that! If not I'll be broke. So after 3 years and 6 months working at Metallkraft, it has all came to an end. Many memories made. Learnt a few things about life and what not. Made a few new friends and met people whom i can trust and whom i can't. Well all in all it was a bitter sweet ending. Wouldn't be who i am today without the experience from there. So yall must be wondering if i'm jobless now right? Well guess who just got employed??! ME. LoL! So after being jobless since 29 May, i'll be starting a new job this coming Tuesday! It'll be at jurong tho. Don't know what to feel about that, but beggars can't be choosers right?
Hmmm so why am i in such rush to accept this job and not look for others? It is because, i am so done with interviews and i have other plans in mind this end of the year. So i need me moolahs asap to save up for something big! Wells this new job offer will be office hours ( boo hoo ) soooo no allowance or what not and say hello to weekend crowds nisa!
Ok i think i should just stop talking about this new job of mine and concentrate on a more happier part of life? ( i mean i am thankful that i have a job ) Well other than that my 3 kitties have all grown up! They are 7 months already! We decided to name them Loki, Labi, Gemok. Don't ask why or how we choose it, but yeh it was decided out of randomness and last minute-ness. Because at the very last minute my dad decided to keep all the 3 babies. So now we have 5 cats in da house! So call me cat lady aite. jk
Sooo this is the part where i ran out of ideas to type and i shall say my good byes. Hmm.. seriously tho, im blank now. HAHA. ok la guys Till we meet again! SAYONARAAAA (:
5:36 AM | Wednesday, July 22, 2015
I love you so much. Keep smiling, Bcuz I love your smile.
2:28 AM | Sunday, May 17, 2015
I wish to think that it's fate that brought us together..
4:40 PM | Wednesday, January 21, 2015
Enough about my hand. Let's talk about Louis ! He's my lil bro now. We've finally managed to convince my parents on getting a cat ! He's half ragdoll and Bengal. He's very cheeky and smart. And by smart, I mean it. He's smart.! Anddddd we're getting another one. And my sis naming her Luna. She's a Persian.... So we shall see about that.
Can't wait to get my 2015 going. It hasn't started due to my hand but ain't no burning hands gona stop me from planning my vancouver trip. InsyaAllah it will happen this August. May it be a safe and enjoyable experience. Heheh with that I'll end it here !
12:57 AM | Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Land of the rising sun
So from the look of these pictures, yes I've climbed mt fuji. My goal of watching the sunrise in the land of the the rising sun has been achieved! Yays.
Though it was as easy as it seems, I was soooo glad that it was over and the view was definitely breath-taking. Something I'll never get bored of looking. Ofcouse, it's Allah's creation, how perfect can it be. The beautiful view of the clouds, landscape and the lands during the day. The awesome stars in the night and not forgetting the sunrise with clouds in the morning. Ahhhh just surreal. And Alhamdulillah it was all good weather and clear skies for us to enjoy for the 2 days there. To witness all that beauty; it's an honour.
The climb was kinda a tough one for me. Especially since I did not train that much before I went. Defo wasn't ready and fit for the climb. But with nyzah's and the two awesome guide that kept motivating me to reach the summit, eventually I managed to witness the sunrise at the top of fuji. Almost wanted to give up 2/3 on the way up there. Cuz I seriously could feel all the gravity pulling me down as I ascended higher. It was no joke. I kept stopping every few steps I took. And yes I was the last in my group.
Oh when u think going up was lika pain in the ass, wait till u go down. Felt like it was never ending route. I swear my knees cuz just give up on me. And with all the pebbles and gravels, it just wasn't helping us. Kept tripping and sliding down. Thank god we rented the hiking boots. My ankle would've just died on me. At the end of the whole descend, our knees were just so jelly I swear it hurts going down the stairs.
Of course the day after was hell. Our body ached like almost everywhere. But that didn't stop us from going out and exploring shibuya and Some temples which also requires us to walk up some hills. -.- so much for our goal that day of not climbing anything anywhere.
Oh did I mention there were old people, the age of ur granparents climbing all the way up to the summit of fuji???! SALUTE! Such will power and endurance man. I'm 22 and I was strunggling like hell climbing that mountain. Such an embarrassment. So, if they could do it, I don't see why can't you (;
Till here.. I've got like 900 plus pictures to edit and filter. Lols. All ze best Nisa.
talk talk ah
ANGRY AND HORNY♥
iqah my lalat(:
little bro ami!